VOTE HERE: https://therealljidol.dreamwidth.org/1083530.html



		When it Rains, It Pours


i do not believe in the power of prayer.

i do not believe in the power of prayer
	i wish i could outthink cancer
		outpray it
		out prey it
but no science has brought us far enough
	and so many of my loves 	
	keep fighting these battles on the cellular level

i know that people are fighting
	in their bodies
	in their labs
     and i just keep adding to my lists of people i miss
			or people fighting for their lives

it’s not one
	it feels like all
	my brother
	my mother
	my friend
	my friend 
	my friend
	       …

and when it rains, it pours
	so many people i know missing organs
		missing human touch while they fight
			their internal wars
		and the hits keep on coming
			       keep on moving towards this brutal future
			i fear my skin and my pains
				and more so i fear yours
		how many more names must i add to the dead
				how many more candles in hope of life
			i do not believe in the power of prayer
				i believe in the power of science
			     but we aren’t here to save lives yet
				we are at measures to comfort
				organs to remove
			      when cancer comes calling
			knocking at my door
			       taking my loves
		i believe in the power of science
			and i believe in grief and fear
				as it touches me cold
			fighting for all the candles i must light
		it’s not just one
			i miss so many
				and fear for so many more

		when it rains
				it pours

-------------------------------------------------------------------

see/hear me here: 





		trolls


a tooth broke
	crown gone
	it wasn’t caramels
				or gum
	just a regular dinner that night
		and				pop
		off comes the crown
			my molar no longer a queen
				it’s given up it’s crown to be a false prophet
			to be false
				but look so real
					the monarch hiding rotten beyond
								       beneath
	
tonight i’m snaggle-toothed
		scared to kiss, scared to chew
	sharpness screaming to be taken
and I’m terrified of the dental pain
		this doctor new to me 
					i worry and 		apparently
					i worship at the gate of my mouth
		begging my crownless queen not to hurt
				not to make me scream and squirm
					when the dentist begins
			
i have options now
	dental insurance and cash to spare
		i have options now
	implant over bridge
			because i cross that bridge everyday that i chew
				cleaning with tiny tools and floss
				swishing the food from underneath
					picking it out
				spending time and energy i would rather not

i’ve crossed that bridge and made the next choice
		i’d rather spend my time than be inconvenienced so
	i’d rather not cross that bridge again

		all hail the queen
			your reign is over



Watch it here:




VOTE LINK: https://therealljidol.dreamwidth.org/1079426.html

I'm on the LaMina tribe, so I would super appreciate if you could vote for me and my teammates:
eeyore_grrl
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gunwithoutmusic
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