come on down to the Mermaid Cafe

          	that one friend




politics have always been a great divide
pitting brother against brother
mother against child
but this year feels so much bigger


i fear that i have become that one friend 
	the one that won’t shut up 
	the one that she feels is overreacting
					overreaching 
						
	and i fear that she is that one friend that is just
							    over


years of building friendship from chance
	random roommates in college
	introductions
built into cathedrals of laughter and tears on the shores of lake erie


and i don’t want that gone
	i miss the laughter that no one else understands
			the words that flow so quickly 
no one in their right mind can keep up
	i miss the understanding that only best friends have


3000 miles 
	but it may as well be light years 
	between us


and we grew with our husbands
	each of us changing slowly 
	each of us changing
			from the young kids that we once were


	leaving us           		distant


right now you are that one friend that i’ve cried about


right now we are that one friendship that i thought would last like diamonds


right now i fear so much
	
	i think that you have forgotten who i am
	and i don’t know you anymore

		i’m with her


i’m angry        because i can’t sleep tonight


i’m crying and pissed off because i was happy
		content lying in bed 
          	ready for sleep


and i started with the memories


every word i’ve heard that made me
					uncomfortable
		started coming back to me
the side jokes of men
	brother and father
	cousin and friend
		grownups around the kitchen table
			in the livingroom 
			on the stairwell
			infiltrating all places of safety


the words that make me unsafe at night
	the ones that showed me
					young
	that breasts are dangerous
					they make me weak
	that blood-flow makes me prey


my husband is away
	our son sleeps soundly upstairs
		i have a cat curled at my hip
and the words of women fly past me
	the truths of rape and pain
	the truths of soft flesh and hard bone
       the deep down poison of our current humanity


and i’m angry 
	because we are in a world that is approving of this
		that continues these stories
						this narrative
		that makes them normal, usual, typical 


this year i’m voting like my life depends on it
			because it does
	our very freedoms are at stake
	our very humanity lies in the balance of this election
		(normally i would think this is hyberbolic
				         		clearly an exaggerated claim
				but not this year
				      not this election
      not this man built of vitriol and darkness)


i vote kindness and inclusion
	i vote for the woman breaking ceilings everywhere she goes
		i vote for my grandmothers and maturity 
			i vote for my son to grow up to be a good
                             i vote for love
                                  i vote 
                                      and i matter