eeyore_grrl | LJ Idol, Week 20, Intersection Week, Rapture of the Deep (mine)

		Rapture of the Deep

it starts like every other dive
check the equipment
	air tanks
	air valves
	secondary equipment
			(may i never need to save you)

and then we start
waist deep in the ocean we struggle to put on our fins
(watching the youngsters do it with ease
	-- dear goddess when did we get so old)

then the fun begins
we drop down
	weighted in our suits
		we kill the buoyancy
	we drop 
	slowly
	deeper into the ocean

the fish are amazing
	even in the murky cold of Monterey
  	i think i saw a jellyfish
	i know i saw starfish and urchins

i’m losing you through the haze
	through the murk
	through the darkness

and i go deeper
	and deeper
		and deeper

oh the beauty of this underwater landscape
	where did you go?	
		you were right here
 	(you never dive alone)
	ahhhh, the fishies, so wonderful to watch
		i see one, two, a hundred and three
	but i don’t see you

and maybe that’s okay
	i’m fine without a dive buddy today
		you’ll be okay
		i’m wonderful

the murky landscape becomes so much more clear
	pinpointed and calm
	the fish dart about
	like i’m watching them through a tube of color

ahhhhhhhhhh
	so relaxing
		so enticing
			so . . .
				beautiful
				(i’m sorry, sometimes words fail)

but maybe i shouldn’t be alone down here
	a warning clicks in my head
	maybe i shouldn’t feel so light and heady 
		50 feet under the ocean
	maybe
	maybe 
	maybe

and here you are
	signing into my mask that time is up
		and it is time to go up

slowly
slowly
slowly

i realize the danger of this beauty
	that the rapture of the deep
	can kill
	and heaven may have been closer than i know

This was written for Intersection Week; My partner is

kehlen_crow. Her prose about Intersubjectivity and drowning and live theatre can be found at http://kehlen-crow.livejournal.com/943025.html?mode=reply#add_comment. The intermingle of our work is gently, but there and clear as day when you see it.

You can see and hear me read mine (recorded when I was outside of starbucks... so there is extraneous noise) at

Watch on YouTube

.

Have a lovely.

LJ Idol, Week 20, Intersection Week, Rapture of the Deep (mine)

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