eeyore_grrl: (carey purple streaks)
I wrote this in college oh-so-many years ago. I will tell you the secret now: the topic is my bisexuality.




huh. I don't have it written out anywhere. Not doing it right now. Enjoy my reading it instead of you...
eeyore_grrl: (carey purple streaks)
It's not mandatory, but if you have a moment you could listen to the song I reference in the following poem. ani difranco's in or out.






			spots and stripes

i was 15 years old, maybe 16
camping for the weekend at Clearwater’s Great Hudson River Revival
	volunteering, freedom to play grown-up, meet new friends,
	and hear new music

we wandered the different stages, secure in our volunteer tee shirts
hearing Pete Seeger tell stories, Sweet Honey in the Rock sing their songs

and then i heard a new voice
	Shira read her blurb and suggested the Ani Difranco set

			we went

we sat on the grass and watched a woman, young, but older than us
play guitar and sing folk music that was more rock
		folk music that centered on her life 
						her politics
	and it made sense

she sang in or out
	while the audience sat and wiggled in dance
		hippie girls twirling in the aisles
“i guess there’s something wrong with me, i guess i don’t fit in”
	the words spoke to me
	i leaned in, listened closer
		watching this woman command a stage
	
“some days the line i walk turns out to be straight,
	other days the line tends to deviate”

and something began to grow
	a realization slowly building
	
i bought the cassette tape
	my yellow walkman constantly playing
	ani’s words digesting in my brain

the next year Shira said that she wanted to kiss me
and i was scared, a girl… i declined
	but thought it through
considered bisexuality
	accepted that it existed
		    that women could be attractive
	we danced to in or out 
	singing along, all the words flowing with my blood
				this song
					    a part of me

years later,
	volunteering and camping again
Shira and i kissed
	i think the music made me do it
		that post college kiss started as teens

	and it was lovely






ani difranco influenced my life, my sexuality, and my poetry. thank you, ani, for showing so many of us the way through the dark.


and VOTING time has come upon us... if you like this go vote for me. And go read the work of others! http://therealljidol.livejournal.com/780955.html?view=76296091#t76296091
eeyore_grrl: (kiss kiss girl girl)
A Day Without Gays

I’ve heard talk of a Day Without Gays in America for today. Ya know the drill, if you are gay you don’t go to work today so that the *other* people can realize the force that the GLBT community is... No, I’m not taking part in this, but I will take a moment for my soapbox.

I am a bisexual woman. I have loved both men and women. At this point in my life I am amazingly in love with a wonderful man who accepts me for who I am and helps me strive to be a better person. We live together and are hoping to start our own family in the not so distant future; At that point we will live a relatively stereotypical life wherein he works and I stay home to raise the children for a few years. I don’t want to date anyone else, male or female, my boyfriend is all that I need in this department.

So, am I still bisexual? Yup. Do the laws that outlaw gay marriage, adoption, etc effect me? They sure do. I didn’t choose my partner based on gender. I could just as easily be in a relationship with a woman. Do I need to announce it, well not for my daily life to go on, but I do feel it important to have out there. This is a part of who I am. This is a part of many people I know and don’t know and hatred and laws against homosexuality touch these people on a daily basis. Sometimes violently. Sometimes subtly. Sometimes via laws and legislation. Sometimes in offhand comments like, “That’s so gay,” to mean it’s stupid.

Maybe it’s because I live in my own liberal mind, but I can’t *comprehend* how gay marriage is so bad to heterosexual couples. I can’t comprehend of a God that is so angry that LOVE between two people is bad. Thankfully, my church (Episcopal) does have people (including my uncle, a priest) who believe in love and are willing to bless same-sex marriages. If this wasn’t the case I would cease any affiliation with the church. Love is a good thing. Wherever you find it in an adult consenting manner.

I am at work today but I’m announcing my gay for the few of you who don’t know it.

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